Where I've been since July 2nd. :)
14 September 2010
I haven't had the heart or the time since my last post to give an explanation of why I've been MIA these past few months.When something bad happens to someone you love, everything else falls by the wayside and seems trivial. To make a very long story short, my Dad was hospitalized at the end of May due to a bad fall, and the last 3 months have been like a true comedy of errors. This past summer felt like I was stuck inside some kind of horrible revolving door of hospitals,( not good for someone who is hospital-phobic) dealing with some good people along the way who genuinely wanted to help, but also many who were just plain jerks. I've seen the' not so great' side to our free health care system here, and it's really scary how people who are ill get shuffled around and nothing gets resolved. Anyway, I think he's finally almost out of the woods and on the way to recovery, thanks to a wonderful doctor I had the good fortune to come across a few weeks ago.
Coping with an ageing parent on your own, and taking on the role of parent to your own parent is very tough on one's psyche, I have to say. These past months have left me feeling depressed, angry, tired, stressed out, & frustrated.. I'm kind of ashamed to say that, but it's the truth. I wish I could change things that can't be changed, and I'm itching to make changes where I can, but have been too afraid or lazy, or maybe just too busy to think with all of this going on.
So, we shall see what Autumn brings about... it's a perfect time for some much needed soul searching that I've been putting off.
We did manage to get away very briefly this summer to Maine, and I even managed to scrap this double page of our time there... it was so lovely, but all too short. I had fantasies of buying a house and never leaving. Talk about avoidance issues... ;p
I also did the one above for an Ella Article written by my gal pal Linda, who is now blogging, (YAY!) and whose blog looks like a million bucks. I'm totally jealous of her web skills, and have begged her to redesign mine. Think a prettier looking blog might just entice me to be, uh... bloggier? :)
14 comments:
sorry to hear about the trials you've had. life can be like that quite often, can't it. and it's ok to admit that you are tired, stressed out and depressed. we all are at some point or another. trials zap our energy. then we need time to recouperate. wishing you that time. practice saying no in front of a mirror. :D
i've always wanted to see maine. looks beautiful there. great pages!
Love how real you are. I'm sorry to hear about your Dad, and the challenges you faced, hopefully he's on the mend. Love the new pages, so much talent!!!
"fantasies...avoidance issues."
Simply coping strategies we are SUPPOSED to use to help us through those really tough times.
Hang in there Mel xxxxx
And hope your Dad continues to recover.
xxx
I'm so sorry about your dad! That is a really heavy burden to bare and you shouldn't feel ashamed. Many people in your position feel the exact same way!
We went to Maine this summer as well...and a piece of my heart has been there ever since! Nice to see you again!
Thanks Sansku. And you're so right... stress drains our good energy away and leaves us so exhausted.:( I totally agree with you on the saying no part too, I've been doing that for a while now, with no regrets. :)
Love your pages!
TF blogging Melanie ;-)
Selfishly on my part...I'm just happy to see you back :)
And I can so relate to all of your feelings too :(
I hope your father continues to improve and autumn brings you many joys!
And you have mad photo skillz! :p
Here in the states in can be much the same situation. Sometimes we got great care and sometimes their egos were so big I KNEW they didn't have my son's best care at heart. I hope that your Dad begins to feel healthy again. It's strange when you move from child to parent of your parents. I'm just beginning that stage a little myself.
Glad to hear that things are finally improving and that your head is staying above water! Big hugs! :)
So sorry you're going through all this with your parents--that's really, really stressful and hard. Thinking of you!
sending good thoughts your way
Mel, I'm glad to hear your dad is on the mend. <3
Don't feel bad about your negative feelings. You are doing everything you can for him, and it's taking its toll on you.
Sending you a hug and hoping that life gets back to a somewhat saner pace this fall.
xo Barb
Hey you! We'll start your new blog design next week?
You may have been absent but you're still a fantastic scrapper! Those layouts are brilliant! Thanks for sharing your dad's story. I know exactly what you're talking about. My Mom lives on her own in Poland and is an elderly lady. I want to help but how??? And the health system seems to be pretty much the same over there, free and not so much people friendly...
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